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Things are different now

Things are different now when we visit my husband’s family.

We’ve been married for 6.5 years and have been dating or “together” since 2002.  I’ve spent a lot of time in his hometown, at the house where he grew up, and with his family.  But it’s different now.

On December 18th of 2008, just 5 months after the birth of our firstborn, Miles, my mother in law passed away very unexpectedly one Tuesday morning.  Since that morning, things haven’t been the same.

Jamie asked on Wednesday if we’d ever had a real break from the holiday routine, as when she was on hospital bedrest before her twins were born.  Christmas 2008 was the year Christmas changed for us.

She never got to see Miles even crawl, let alone stand, walk, talk, and read.  She didn’t get to hear his sweet voice sing “Happy Birthday” or tell her about all the friends on “Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.”  She didn’t get to see how he looks so much like his Daddy, her son.

She never knew that a second son would be coming, in the not-so-distant future.  She never got to see or hold Spencer, though they do share a birthday.  She didn’t get to see how much Spencer looks like her son, perhaps even more than Miles.

She loved her grandson and would love them both so very much.  She would love Miles’s enthusiasm and she would love Spencer’s spunk.  She would love that their blue eyes remind us of both of their grandmas, who both have the brightest blue eyes.  And she would have loved to see them grow.

Val, we feel your absence as we celebrate your life.

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About Krista

Krista is a full-time working mom of two boys, currently aged 6 and 7. She lives in Kentucky with her husband, Brandon.


  1. She was such a great lady! I love that you have made her a part of the boys’ life even though she isn’t with us anymore. Prayers for you and Brandon as you remember Val. Shw always had the best smile!

  2. Amanda Duke says:

    I lost my mom after a 6 month battle with cancer when my twins were only 6 months old. They are now 3 1/2 and I have a 9 month old daughter. My mom was my best friend so I know Heavenly Father blessed me with my little girl because I missed my mom so much. She was even born with a little cherry mark on her eyelid which I like to think was a kiss from my mom. People used to tell me it would get easier but I don’t think they’ve ever experienced losing such a special person because it never does and things will never be the same.

  3. Amanda – I’m very sorry about your mother. That’s really sweet about your daughter’s birthmark!